This blog is a reminder and celebration of one of our greatest gifts. It’s the power of choice. This gift means we can choose to create victory out of seeming defeat. We can be champions rather than victims. We can gift ourselves and others compassion, empathy and love instead of feeling guilt and passing blame and judgment. No matter how daunting and bleak life may seem, we can always create a new path and outcome with the choices we make. Knowing this makes me feel empowered and unstoppable.
It begins with choosing our thoughts and behavior. Our experience of life is a direct result of how we think. Loving yourself starts with accepting who you are, your gifts, talents, imperfections and all. Choose to hold positive and loving thoughts about people, the world and yourself. See the challenges in life not as things done to you, but rather things done for you. This powerful shift in your thinking takes you from a victim mindset to one of a champion.
When I was going into the military, I listed the east coast as the part of the country I wanted to be stationed at. This would allow me to be close to my family in Tennessee. After boot camp, I received orders to report to Yuma, Arizona. I was disappointed and very angry. I blamed the government for not keeping their commitment to me. Blame is such a low level energy that produces the exact opposite of what we really want. I didn’t know it at the time but I was thinking like a victim and my behavior soon followed suit. My first two years in the southwest were spent contacting my recruiter and writing my congressman about the injustice. I told anyone who would listen how I had been wronged. Then one day a friend gave me Tony Robbins’ book, Awaken The Giant Within. After a just few pages I realized how much precious time I had wasted by thinking and behaving like a victim. I had become a cynical person about the government, people and life in general. How much better could my life had been served, if I had chosen to see my time in southern Arizona as an opportunity to learn Spanish, take evening college courses and visit west coast cities.
Fast forward to today and my mindset is completely different thanks to the lessons I learned twenty five years earlier. Now I am a big believer in the importance of training my mindset by learning a new skill in much the same way as I train my body. With discipline and commitment I read personal development books and listen to inspirational podcasts each morning. This directly shapes the choices I make during the day. Do my thoughts, behavior and choices move me closer to my goal? Am I loving, compassionate and forgiving to others? Do the people in my life make me better or distract me from who I can be? Do I value my gifts and honor them by using them daily to serve others instead of allowing outside noise to distract me? Do I hold myself accountable when I fall short of who I can be? Do I apologize when I’ve let others and myself down? Do I have a leader and champion’s mindset? Do I truly love myself and others? And does my behavior reflect this?
Thankfully I’ve gotten a few more chances to choose since my days in the Marines. One occurred a little over a year ago. Admittedly, it took me a little bit of time to find my footing and accept responsibility for my role in the incident. But as soon as I did, I began making choices consistent with someone who is not perfect but rather committed to learning from their failures and trying to get better each day. I chose not to be a victim or pass blame or take it on myself. I made a choice to learn, grow and be better. I chose to accept things as they were “and grow where I was planted.”
The power to choose is our most important gift. Wherever you are and whatever you’re going through, you can chart a new course by exercising your power to choose. Ask yourself the questions above. The rewards that come from choosing wisely are limitless.
Stronger Mindset!
Keith